I posted this tweet by Adam Grant in my stories on Monday.
We, as a society, are talking a lot about gratitude because November just happened. While I am one who has found healing through gratitude, I had to alllow myself the other feelings that weren’t so grateful to exist to get there. When we suppress feelings that are not pleasant, they come out in other ways: Triggers, yelling, withdrawing our love from one another, etc.
Author-Therapist Dr. Aundi Kolber says this:
Emotional suppression is not the same thing as authentic resilience.
But there are things we can do to help each other. In our churches we often talk about giving our thanks to God, no matter what. Even when life has given you nothing but grief.
We are really hard on Israel in scripture because they did not always do that. I find it fascinating how we scold Israel but never God. I say this as someone who deeply believes in God and loves I can have a real relationship with God like Israel did. That means I’m safe to come with all the intense emotions without fear of abandonment.
God doesn’t need our defense; people do.
The way we are treating each other is making us physically and mentally ill. It affects our bodies. Whether it’s emotional abuse or not taking the vaccine and spreading conspiracy theories about them, or whatever else we are doing that is anything but love. Love is responsibility.
What if we gave this gratitude that we give to God without question to each other too.
Can you imagine the difference that would make? To be seen and known by each other. To be safe no matter where we are mentally or physically. To know someone is staying in the room and not leaving until you are ready to get back up—like elephants do for each other.
I think it’s time to take some of the things we’ve disciplined ourselves to do for God; although, I think we could work more on questioning God too. God can handle it. People could too if we knew we were safe and loved no matter what.
This is how we heal.
2 thoughts on “Gratitude, a Different Angle”
One of the purest forms of gratitude I’ve seen is when a toddler thanks another toddler without adult prompting. Both toddlers benefit for sure.
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So sweet. Yes, nothing like pure gratitude—especially from a child.
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